Blog

We have decided to take a break from the whole house buying/selling thing. We took the house off the market for a few months so we could enjoy the holiday season.That was the BEST decision I have made in a long time. The first weekend that we left the house and didn’t spend 30 minutes prior running around cleaning, picking up, looking through each room was wonderful.

I being the overly organized one have been a little crazy with the fact that the kids have not had their rooms clean EVERY day, and the kitchen floor has been neglected. My kids and husband have had true happiness though that I have not bugged them constantly about picking up something. However today I am very glad I do not have to worry about the house being cleaned.

My kitchen floor is dirty and sticky, the dishes are dirty, the floor needs to be vacuumed desperately, and I don’t even want to go in the bathroom. Normally I would be totally stressed about this, house for sale or not, but today I have sick kids. One that wants to be held one minute and not the next. The other that wants to be left alone, but as I mom I can’t help but check on him every 5 minutes to make sure the rash he has is not worse. The hours it will be until he can see the doctor and we can confirm he does not have the plague are torture, (I know he doesn’t have the plague, but it is very possible he has a very bad case of strep, at least that is what the nurse tells me, and why I have instructions to pull up to the back door and NOT to enter the waiting room.)

So anyone that happens to show up announced or unannounced watch out, my house may beg you to help it out, but just ignore it please, I have learned that eventually it does get all clean and pretty but that’s usually when the kids are at grandma’s!

There is one word that is hard for me to hear. You might think it’s BUTT or STUPID which my son says all the time, but no those are not the ones I’m talking about. By the way, we will discuss how you get those words to stop being part of every conversation at another time. The word I’m referring to that really is difficult is, “grandpa”. That word is a great word, don’t get me wrong, however I have to confess, when I hear it, especially from my 18 month old it makes me sad.

I don’t hear it often because my kids don’t really have a reason to say it everyday since both of their grandpa’s are not living. However on Thanksgiving as we were preparing to go celebrate Dylan says, “Grandpa!” with as much excitement as an 18 month old can. I was excited he could say such a word since his vocabulary is very small right now. However my excitement quickly turned to gloom. I quick flash of all the life moments that he would NOT have a Grandpa around for immediately flooded my mind and hit me like a ton of bricks.

I let the gloom take me over the whole next day, I was in a funk, but then, then something happened. I went to visit my family, we laughed, we ate cake, ate my dad’s favorite pizza, and we played games. It was just what I needed. Especially when as we were leaving, my Aunt sneaks Lauren her money back that she took to spend at the movies and she says, “it was my treat”. Yep, that is exactly something her Grandpa would do for her, take her out, spoil her, and try to keep it a secret.

No, my kids may not have someone to call, “grandpa”, but they have lots of people to call GRAND!

I have always tried to have gratitude, and find something good about my challenges. MOST OF THE TIME. I am thankful when my son climbs on the closet shelf and it spills over, because I get to re-organize( I love to re-organize). I am grateful for washers, because there is no way I want to wash clothes by hand. I am grateful there are soccer coaches so I can sit for an hour while my kids run around and get tired, so they can catch up with me (who was tired before we left for soccer).

I am grateful for family members that can help out with my children so I can work, or help out at school, or have a date night with my husband. I am grateful that when my kids get sick there is a doctor that has worked hard to learn how to take care of my little ones. I am even grateful for those sicknesses at times, because it lets me appreciate the health we have.

Like I said, I try to find the good in most things, however that does not mean I do not mumble, grumble, and down right get mad sometimes. However I eventually try to find some good, even if at the time I do not feel that way. For example, when Aaron was sick and at the hospital, I really didn’t find the good. At the time I just thought I couldn’t handle this, I want my baby home, I need to take care of his sister and I just didn’t think it was “fair” or good at all. I now can say, I am grateful for that experience because, it made me realize it could have been much worse. Aaron could have spent months in the hospital and had very serious problems, but instead, he is healthy, happy, and only has some minor speech issues as a result.

When my father passed away I was not very grateful either. I was mad, down right mad, and could not find any good. 12 years later, I still can’t see how it was “good”, or why I should be grateful for this, but I have found that due to this, I now know how precious life is, how we need to tell those we love we love them, and show it daily. We need to make memories now. I sometimes forget this when I’m busy working on work stuff, or cleaning the house. Then I take a minute, remember this moment will not last long, and we are never promised more time. I then put the computer down, cuddle the baby, play the game, or make the snack.

So, although I may not always know to be grateful at the time, I have found there is usually always something you can be grateful for, even if it takes awhile to realize.

What are you all grateful for this Turkey day?

So last night I was a little achy and therefore unable to sleep, (I blame that darn flu shot), When this happens I typically turn on the television so distract me. When I turned it on what is usually kids shows during the day has turned into Nick at Night, and that now includes Friends. Yes people, Friends is now  Nick at Night show. I’m so old. Anyway, as I was half listening too it and trying to fall asleep the show made me think back about my “friends”.

Over the years I have developed a lot of friendships. Most of the time when I was growing up I never really considered myself having many friends. I had people I would talk to at school or church, but not someone I called fifty times a day and had to be with all the time, or that would be there no matter what. I never really thought I would ever have real friends to be honest.

I am so glad I turned out to be wrong. I have been blessed with some very good people in my life. I have friends that I have known for years that have taught me it’s alright to not be serious all the time and teach you how to laugh, and then hold your hand while you attend your father’s funeral. Other friends that will drop what they are doing to help you when you call in a panic in the middle of a snowstorm. I have friends that know when I need a break and will plan a night out. I have friends that will tell you when you are being crazy, and ones that never forget a Birthday. I have friends that will know just when to make me laugh and when to stay away. Friends that showed me how to put on makeup, or ones that tutored me on how to survive potty training. I have good friends.

Whether I have known you for decades or just met you last week, you know who you are and what I am talking about. I may not see you every day, and I may not have seen you in years, but I just wanted to take a minute to tell you all thanks for putting up with me, either since we were 12 or for the last 5 minutes!

I know you are all singing, “I’ll be there for you, cause you’re there for me too…”

You’re welcome!

I got home today from working, kids were hungry, only one was excited about pizza, but it was not the child that wants to eat it morning, noon, and night. He refused to eat it and was very disgruntled that I even had the idea of me making homemade pizza for dinner. After the dinner battle was over, the youngest wanted to go to bed, he has not been feeling well. While the older two where extremely rowdy and would not settle down to let the baby sleep or to do their homework.

I get the kids to do reading and study spelling. I even made myself some dinner and sat down to eat it. You know where this is going. The minute you think you have things under control, big mistake. The rules of being a mom are simple, never think you have things under control, and never think you can make yourself dinner with all three kids up, husband gone, and be able to eat it hot.

I had about three bites and then Aaron through his coat at his sister, but it hit me instead, almost knocking the plate over. The noises made Dylan awaken and he came out full of energy and ready to play. Aaron was happy to play with him but 5 year olds are not always observant and he closed the toy cabinet on Dylan’s hand. Many tears, a stern lecture, and some baby Tylenol and things were calm again. However my dinner was cold, it was past bed time. At the time that this is happening I just feel like I want, no need a vacation day. One glorious day when no one is complaining, arguing, ignoring, or disrespecting.

Then people, then what happens is the kids go to bed, they fall asleep. Dylan crawls in my lap cuddles up and falls asleep. I have all the vacation I need, and since all the kids are asleep and the husband is still not home, I have a girlie show recorded and cookie dough ice cream in the freezer!

What do you do when your daughter almost misses the bus because she is pouting that she has to wear pants that fit her perfectly, but have a button and are “uncomfortable”, your son only wants to eat pizza for every meal and is quite upset when he doesn’t get it, and your other son cries when you won’t let him have this new thing he discovered called….candy?

When you have a busy weekend planned, and you decide you can take on just one more thing that adds another day of work, along with volunteering, and oh yeah you have to take a mandatory 5 day class starting Monday for your teaching job or you can’t teach anymore.

Well, I will tell you what you do. You forget the laundry, dishes, bathroom cleaning, and even trying to educate your 18 month old. You stay in your pajamas until 10am, eat a cold pop tart for breakfast, (because getting out the toaster would just be too much work), and you find a new free game on the phone, and play it until you run out of points and have to wait until you get a new allotment tomorrow.

I guess I better now get busy with the cleaning, grading, and taking care of business. Break from reality over. See you again someday.

What do you do to escape reality?

I have some random funny stories to share because I figured we all could use a little chuckle today.

First, my daughter and husband had a conversation the other night when I made stuffed shells. Ellis was eating them and my daughter asked what is in them, he told her “regatta” cheese. I later told him that regatta is a boating event, not a cheese.

Second, I had a sneezing fit a few days ago, I sneezed and my lens fell out of my glasses. I guess I am a very powerful sneezer, is that a word?

Third, Dylan, there is always Dylan. He loves to climb in the laundry baskets and play. I have no idea why, and I think it’s funny when he does it.

Oh, and Aaron has been constantly saying the word, “butt” for everything. He calls me a butt, his sister a butt, even his room is sometimes a butt. I just love it when they learn new things. So Sunday I asked him to put on his shoes, and he says he doesn’t want to put on “butt shoes”. I replied by asking how does his butt wear shoes? He sat on them and scooted around the room sitting on his shoes.

What funny things have happened in your lives lately?

Lauren is in 3rd grade, and apparently 3rd grade is the year they focus on learning about the election, and the government processes in general. I am sure this is the reason she informed me I was old enough to be president. Thanks Lauren, I needed that. She also informed me she could be president when she was 35 because she was born in America, and she also thought a girl would be a good President. Today she was extra excited she got to vote at school. She got to wear red, white, and blue. She made sure I was going to vote. I assured her I was and so was Dad.

I am sure part of her excitement was just that she got to wear any shirt she wanted and it didn’t have to be a polo, but I know there was excitement as well knowing she had learned about the candidates and she really had a definite favorite. She asked if she could watch some of the results of the real election tonight. She assured me it would probably be a close race because she thought both candidates had good points.

As she was talking this morning I became very grateful for Freedom. I was grateful that she had a teacher that was free to teach them about both candidates and what they stood for. I was grateful that she was able to make a choice. I was also grateful that I can vote for real, and that I had a choice.

I hope everyone that can votes today, I am not concerned with who you are voting for, what you believe in, or why. I just want everyone to enjoy their rights and be excited for their freedom to choose just as much as my little 3rd grader that has to leave it all up to us for the next 10 years until she can vote for real.

Something all of you in cyberspace may not know about me is that I volunteer for my church as a primary leader. What that means is that every Sunday, I and some other great people, help the children of our church-age 3-11 learn about the Gospel. It also means that each year one of my duties is to organize a program where the children get to share what they have learned throughout the year. For this year our theme is, “choose the right.” The program this year will be the third one I have been in charge of putting together.

It is a lot of work, but I really love to watch the kids learn and grow. Last week we had our first practice and everyone did a great job, except my own children of course. My son would not sit in his seat, and my daughter basically told everyone I was forcing her to get up and talk to everyone. However I can ignore them because next to them is a wonderful little blonde girl who sings her heart out and knows all the words to all the songs. There is a shy older girl who was brave and said her part with ease, and there is the boy who does not come every week, but when he is there you know he enjoys seeing his teacher by the smile on his face.

Today, I am sure my blood pressure will rise when I find that no matter how much I plan, something goes wrong, or someone doesn’t show up, or my son hides under the pew and refuses to sit with everyone else.(yes that is what he did last week). However I will remember the waves and smiles I get when the 4 years olds see me. The wonderful talks that the older kids prepared themselves about what they learn. I will remember that no matter how much work it is or how much I see the little things that go wrong, in a year, or two, or 10 I won’t remember those little things, I will just remember that for a moment I was part of their lives.

So lately Aaron, my 5-year-old, has been rather obsessed with learning to drive. It breaks a mom’s heart a little to think about her baby growing up and not needing her. I have already experienced Lauren and Aaron not needing me to change their diapers, get them dressed, brush their teeth,push them on the swing, bath them, and most of the time even fix their food. They are rather self-sufficient, (which I know is the point, but it still makes you feel a little less important on those milestones).

I start to think about the day that he will drive, and then go to college and then get married, and not really need me at all. When he first said that he wanted to learn to drive, I thought, “Man he already is planning to leave me”. Most days I am fine with my role as a parent and I totally understand, my job is to help them to learn, grow, and want to leave, be independent, and become grown ups. However I was hoping for a little more than 5 years to achieve that goal.

With that said, last night Aaron, the same boy obsessed with learning to drive comes out of his room after bed time and says, “Mom, is it ok if I still live with you when I’m big?”

I replied, “Yes Aaron, you are always welcome at Mom and Dad’s”. I know tomorrow he will be plotting his freedom but for now I am just happy that one day when he was 5 he still thought he would be happy to live with me when he is a grown up, and some days that is just nice for a mom to hear.